I'm down in the bowels

of hopeless negativity.

I know the place well,

having spent years of

my life here. I'm surprised

to be back, but it all

feels so familiar - the lack

of energy, the psychic pain,

my brain spitting out

useless thought loops.

"Please help me," I pray,

to no particular divine

incarnation. "I've lost my way."

I hear a one-word instruction:

"Breathe." So I do. Not deeply,

but I take a breath and then two.

"Relax," the voice says, and I try,

letting my shoulders drop,

releasing the clench in my gut.

"Feel what you feel," the voice directs.

Tears leak from my eyes.

"My head hurts," I say, "and I'm

ashamed to be in the depths again.

Surely I know better.

But sometimes I get overwhelmed

without even knowing why.

I slide down a spiral of thoughts

until I'm lost and it seems there's

no way out." "Watch both your

inner and your outer experience,"

the voice says, "and allow it all to be.

Stop fighting with yourself."

"Oh!" I exclaim a short time later.

"I'm back! All it took was that

little bit of practice to lift me

out of the pit and give me

enough distance from my

inner darkness to bring me

into the light. Thank you,"

I say to whatever aspect of

divine or cosmic mind

gave me those instructions.

"You are very welcome,"

I hear. "Seek and you will always find.

Knock and the door will open.

Pray, and something will shift."

I wait, but that is all the voice

has to say today. I'm grateful for

the journey I just made from lost to found.